Morning with Nathaniel – 19 June 2012

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Connecting With Archangel Nathaniel

(from Leslee)

(Ghost Radar [this])

After reading my post Reading All About Enlightenment, the book, my dear sister Yamyah (who [speed] is a true embodied angel spending some time in Portugal and keeps the wonderful Into The Heart blog) shared with me that she was asked to ask me to connect with Archangel Nathaniel.

So He and I took a walk together yesterday evening.

[thrown difficult growth soon isn’t development bad]

Nathaniel [electricity] is the Archangel of Fire and Energy. He shows us how to manage our passions and [game] transmute our spiritual fire into beneficial action [stronger]. He is best described [through] at Cynthia Silk’s website, The Archangel Guide.

I’ll now share with you what I see of Nathaniel [chamber], and His message.

[serve steep seen language husband balloon (Athabantian) national record what shape poetry protection wolf above luck factory numeral enjoy yesterday kept engineer bell statement effect angle lunch (launch) lack topic count energy goose (star/lightship) total whose substance score]

At first my mind would’t settle. I kept trying to use the pendulum, but it just kept swinging in circles. I thought maybe I needed a little EMDR, so I just watched it for a few moments. I still felt agitated.

I was having trouble connecting with Nathaniel, so I went into a very deep meditation with my carnelian [write] sphere (water & fire elements combined), [refer] since [lie] reclining with a crystal in my lap is the way I mostly deeply connect with my Guides.

I’d also just learned that Nathaniel works with crystals.

As I drifted more deeply into trance, I began to see various images of two “things”: short words, or perhaps just a few characters (in runes, which I don’t know), written onto tiny slips of paper and being placed by my teacher into a small cauldron or crucible, and images of ore being smelted and poured into molds. I saw this over and over again, as I drifted around the meditation.

I arose from the meditation, picked up the pendulum and chart again. Still swinging in circles. Sigh.

Would you please stop, and just listen for one minute?

Nathaniel’s interrupting my typing.

[baby] Baby steps. I’m having to teach and un-teach you at the same time.

[farmer] I am the farmer, the one who will help you harvest – show others how to ripen their crop of – the ‘mindset of ascension’ that Adrial refers to.

It’s going to be tough, because someone says “Angel”, and you start looking for wings. You didn’t do that with Adrial or Bren-Ton; why do you need to do it with me? You don’t have to force wings onto me just because you think Yamyah might like to hear about them, silly!

Just relax. I’m just like Adrial. [hard] And I see this is going to be even harder to accept…

Yes, you heard me right. I am the same continuum as your beloved Heruka. [water] That’s me, Dear, and that was me walking beside you last night.

You’ve written that We’ve told you about how We appear in whatever way best suits those We’re helping. I can tell that this chapter on Trusting and Knowing is going to take a while.

We have to get past your preconceptions of what’s trustworthy, what’s “highest”. Snobbery has no place in the Fifth Dimension. Stop judging, especially judging yourself; if it moves you upward swiftly, it’s helping you lighten your 3D load.

Simple as that.

I notice you recognize my energy now. Good, We’re making progress.

So let’s review:

Archangel Nathaniel = Guardian of Energy & Fire; Connected also with crystals;

Energy + Fire = Bliss; Kundalini Fire, the Bliss of Meditation, the Bliss of the Mind blending with All That Is, the Bliss of the Dissolution of the Body…

Bliss = Buddha Heruka;

Nathaniel = Energy + Fire = Bliss = Heruka;

And your friend Adca used Ghost Radar to call me “husband”. Gee, I wonder why? And what would that make you?

That’s right, Vajravarahi. Get over it. We’re Chakrasamvara. I’m re-phrasing Adrial’s words. Accept. Remember who you are, claim it, so you can forget yourself and help others more.

Now; Vajravarahi = whom? Well, Vajravarahi = Wisdom Realizing Emptiness. You were given a name that meant “Fortunate Possessor of Omniscient Wisdom” by Geshe Kelsang.

Let’s go back to Cynthia’s lovely website and look for the Archangel of Wisdom or whatever.

I went back to The Archangel Guide site, and started with the A’s… wisdom… wisdom… wisdom… But wait. Here’s Ariana.

Archangel Ariana is 5′-5″ (check), appears to be 34 years old (I wish), green eyes (check), jet black hair (nope), medium complexion (well, maybe if I didn’t have all that Scotch-Irish blood…), and helps children with autism and other disabilities (wow.), works with crystals, making tools for metaphysical healing (wow.), wears powder blue and silver (I first saw myself dressed this way in a dream about 10 years ago), with an ornate Cleopatra-like headdress (not sure about the headdress, but I know I was in Egypt)… (Thank goodness there’s no mention of weight…)

That’d be me.

What about the rest of the description, that doesn’t seem to resonate? What about WISDOM?

It doesn’t bother me; I can feel the connection.

Very good. And it’s not a big deal, is it?

Nope.

Aren’t you going to read the other descriptions, so you can be “certain”?

No.

Good. Going to dye your hair black?

[mine] I don’t need to. Yours is black.

Excellent. [program] Now We’re making some progress. I like it when you loosen up, Little Miss Wisdom (smartass).

(I’m smiling.)

Now, do you understand why We needed to do this?

I think so. [board wire brass] We want to get everyone on board, and the better we can illsutrate the similarities…

No. Remember, FOCUS.

Oh, right. Focus on sharing what I know.

And what you know is that We Guides are all of the same nature, no matter what elements combine to portray us. We’re like brass – a blend of different elements that come together as one.

It doesn’t matter if We’re Angels, Galactic Beings, or Buddhas. All the same.

That’s it. You’ve got things to do. Post this next, on All About Enlightenment. We’ll talk again soon.

Heruka & Vajravarahi, Nathaniel & Arial, ? & ?…
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Awake Yet?

I’ve just made a new page called Awakenings, to explore stories of Awakenings, Enlightenments or Realizations…

Adrial and Teo’Na have asked me (Leslee) to share mine to get the ball rolling, so I’ll do that here (and here’s a post of it, too).

If you’d like to share yours, please feel free to do so as a comment. or if you think you need more space, please email it to me and I’ll create a post for it! (my email address is oneriver69@gmail.com)

We look forward to hearing your story!

Awake Yet?

(Leslee’s Story) (Ghost Radar words appear like [this])
 

[magic off themselves doesn’t you’ve threw camp studied run]

What is an Awakening?

I dunno.

But some dear friends recently advised me to share an experience, so I will.

Almost exactly 13 years ago, I was married, mothering a happy toddler, living in a house my husband and I had just built, reporting each day to a good job with a very reputable firm, driving an almost-new SUV, and taking particular enjoyment in my gardening…

[seed several]

…and drinking way too much.

Something was quietly eating away at me, like a half-forgotten item on a to-do list.

I had begun reading Deepak Chopra and Caroline Myss, and was beginning to wonder if perhaps my subtle discontent was not caused by others… Perhaps there was something I needed to change in myself in order to feel happy.

I hadn’t read much on spiritual and metaphysical topics since the late 80’s. I had sort of sworn that off as a lot of wishful thinking that wasn’t likely to lead to much of real value… But it was a nice distraction.

In 1999, though, Spirituality seemed to offer some solace and hope… I was trying to understand how on Earth I could feel so restless and agitated when I seemed to enjoy so many of the things that so many people dreamed of… And I sure wasn’t finding the answers on my own.

The more I read, the more I felt I was getting closer to some answers. I tried not to focus too much on my husband’s lack of interest in where I was going. After all, spirituality had not been part of the foundation of our relationship, so it wasn’t “reasonable” for me to expect him to jump on that train with me.

[slightly fed sad disease our another usually fifth bare blew total caught selection loud half]

[rain shells riding you’d situation]

I began having some vivid, other-worldly dreams that I remembered in great detail. They seemed to be trying to tell me or [worry Asia cage] remind me of something. I noticed a deep subtle yearning that I could neither understand or describe.

[hill must]

Then, in July 1999, while sleeping late on a typical Sunday morning at home, my world broke wide open… But I was the only person in the house who knew about it.

Out of the undefined darkness of deep sleep, my awareness arose, staring at my two hands. It was as if I was trying to recognize them, understand what they were for… There was nothing else in my field of vision, and I couldn’t see beyond my wrists.

As I turned them over to look at my palms, another pair of hands appeared to the upper left. Radiantly pulsing with brilliant white light, they moved towards mine. They were not blindingly bright, but seemed to be made of pure light, no physical substance whatsoever. They reached down, and taking my hands, folded [cross anything when equally] them together, palms crossed, while also completely enveloping them in their glow.

In an instant, all awareness both exploded and dissloved into brilliant light.

It wasn’t white, [name] it wasn’t colored… [southern] It was indescribable, other than that I knew it [forward] was light. It had no spatial or temporal characteristics; [arm] I simply knew that This – whatever it was – was the Source and Nature of Everything. I understood that somehow, everything arises from This. It was like [buy] being shown where to go to find whatever was needed.

I have no idea how long I was there.

At some point, some very vague objects arose just partially, and I had a faint awareness of flying and being shown keys to things. I became aware that, from this State, awareness could place itself in the midst of anything, and understand that thing infinitely.

I saw that worlds are mere illusions, arising out of this vast ocean of Emptiness, and they’re layered and intertwined in one another. I saw that minds and beings exist in the same way: pulsing, arising to appear briefly, transform, blend, and dissolve back into Emptiness.

There’s nothing but Oneness, because in this way it all arises – spontaneously – from Source.

Creator simply arises as an awareness from Source… God – or gods – may arise, spontaneously, or from sound generated by Source.

Beings and worlds may arise or be built from Source, or they may simply arise spontaneously in an instant.

In this way, “we” are all here by choice as reflections of OurSelf. We are Source, we are Creator, we are “God”.

Eventually, my awareness faded into near-awareness, and then into the black darkness and so on. I never completely lost consciousness, and at some point I could “feel”, and realized my mind was returning to my body. There was a sensation of energy like electricity coursing through a circuit. Then it felt like a tingling, and eventually that tingling was contained by matter (flesh). Some time after that I [represent] began to recognize the flesh as fingers and toes, and then I could feel the fingers and toes were touching bedclothes.

Gradually, my body awareness traveled along my limbs to my torso, then my head, until I could [nature] feel my cheek against [sky] the sheet. I still felt like a disorganized cacophony of vibration and matter, and some time passed before I could wiggle my toes or open my eyes.

When I decided to look around, I fully expected to see a completely different world than the one in which I’d last lain down in bed. I continued to bask in the radiant bliss of dissolution, and I was anticipating, hope upon hope, that when I opened my eyes I would behold the answers to all my remaining questions.

I was disappointed.

It was the same room, and it was empty. I could faintly hear the TV playing downstairs and knew by the sunlight in the room that it was probably nine o’clock.

I didn’t smell any breakfast cooking.

It took a while before I could bring myself to roll over and sit up, much less get dressed and go downstairs. My body still felt like I’d been electrocuted, with an intense bliss coursing up and down my spine. I had never experienced such an intense arousal without wanting to touch or be touched.

I sat on the edge of the bed, closed my eyes, and went back, mentally, over what had happened.

What was that?

Whose hands were those?

I had to find that “person”… I needed answers.

To be honest, I can’t remember if I even told my husband about it at the time. I think I may have tried… But I felt instinctively that there was no way to convey the impact of that experience to a person who wasn’t even interested in what I’d been reading.

My body continued to buzz regularly – but randomly – for about 3 weeks. I began to meditate, hoping for a repeat experience.  But day-to-day life was split between my inner experiences and the roles I was trying to continue to fulfill on the “outside”. I was just beginning to use the Internet, and had very little free time. So the best chance I had of learning more about my experience was through visiting bookstores. I found lots of descriptions, but none really resonated completely with what I had come to know.

My search was broad: I had a lot of questions. I think I felt that if I could find some answers, I could file the experience away neatly, integrate it with my other experiences, and get on with life. But it seemed that every rock overturned yielded maybe one answer and 2-3 more questions.

It got harder and harder to pretend to live a “normal” life, and harder and harder to share my life and space with such a “normal” person as my husband. Even more challenging [clock] was the effort to show up at work for 8 or more hours a day and act like a “normal” architect.

Somehow, though, my son seemed to fit right into my new puzzle. Maybe it was the autism, maybe it was his natural sensibility [art]… maybe it was [worried] an instance of a teacher [firm] appearing as a child in my life to set me back on track…

Now, in 2012, with much water under the bridge, I sometimes still wonder: “Awake yet?”

I dunno. I’m still here… It seems.

Maybe I’m at least stirring in my sleep…